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Submitted on
March 1, 2014
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I am not the sunlit wing-print
splayed out on the bedroom wall.
I am not the dark mass forming
in a  corner of an airless hall.
I am not the viscous vengeance
where you sink your spinning wheels.
I am not the leaky bucket
hung up on your wishing well.

You are not my soul mate missing
wandering a winter's night.
You are not the sound of angels
singing by a candle's light.
You are not the rasp of fingers
fumbling with  a hasp of steel.
You are not the tattered towel
soaking up the things I feel.

I am the oblivious child,
dancing where the wildflowers are.
You are my unwitting captive
lighting up a jelly jar.
...
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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-04-19
A piece so lyrical the rhyme scheme seems effortless: Stranger Love by Sssorry ( Featured by neurotype )
:iconnekopanda1358:
nekopanda1358 Featured By Owner Jun 11, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
This poem is really good! Don't stop writing!
Reply
:iconwordeea:
Wordeea Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
love the end
well done
Reply
:iconleah084:
Leah084 Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014
hmm...loved this...interesting.
Reply
:icontime-signature:
Time-Signature Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014  Student General Artist
What is this?  Pure talent?
It was beautiful, thank you :)
Reply
:iconthehauntofmelancholy:
TheHauntOfMelancholy Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Amazing....
Not mere fumbling lines hastily written
For this piece is a real gem
the unwitting captives who are smitten
are the readers who've read this poem
Reply
:iconattyyay:
Attyyay Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
oooh, yessss!  soaking up the things I feel Heart 
Reply
:iconysabellauridsen:
Ysabellauridsen Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
What type of poem is that?
Reply
:iconthegalleryofeve:
TheGalleryOfEve Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Congratulations on your well-deserved DD!!! :iconflyingheartsplz::iconlainloveplz::iconflyingheartsplz: :clap::clap::clap:
I’m very happy for you!!! :iconloveloveplz: :tighthug:
Reply
:icontales-of-tao:
Tales-of-Tao Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student General Artist
Beautiful. The flow of words here is just stunning. :heart: Congrats on the DD!
Reply
:iconsandzen:
sandzen Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014   General Artist
I love the darkness and the fun of this piece. Something a postmodern Carroll might've written.
Reply
:iconnullibicity:
Nullibicity Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I can really relate to this... in so many ways, I feel my head spinning. I see the beauty in this... and I'm glad you received a DD. The conflicting emotions in this... even the images... stir my soul to really delve into each word you so carefully selected. All of the examples you've given, too, seem to shine with importance, and they slowly build up this heart wrenching and beautifully-worded tower... on the verge of collapsing in the wake of daylight. It whispers of a hard reality, and I, too, almost wish not to look within it for the sake of the characters. There are just so many things that captivate me about this piece, and I feel that even if I dissected this for hours, I still would not be able to untangle all of the beautiful meaning from your words.
Thank you so much for sharing! and congratulations!! This was a pleasure for me to read. :rose:
Reply
:iconoveo:
Oveo Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:heart: So good.
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Thank you for reading my poem and kindly commenting Oveo.
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconpointerofreality:
Pointerofreality Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
How disheartening...raw pain at those last two lines, ouch.
Good poem though
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Thank you Pointerofreality, I'm sorry you found this disheartening, but I'm glad you enjoyed the poem.
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconpointerofreality:
Pointerofreality Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Don't be sorry, I enjoy things that make me feel things. Reminds me I'm still alive.
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
I get that, Pointifreality, or at least I do in my own way :)
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconpointerofreality:
Pointerofreality Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Please, call me Vincent
Reply
:iconshaneprocrastinates:
ShaneProcrastinates Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student General Artist
Woah, this is really great.

I get the impression that it is a firefly of some sorts, but when I read that I had to read the poem through 3 times till I was happy xD

Amazing use of visual literacy, you paint a great scene before you lay down a conceptual ending :)

Mind = Blown

Fantastic piece, glad you received a DD for it cause it's well deserved :) Keep up the good work!
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Thank you very much for reading my poem and so kindly commenting, ShaneProcrastinates. I'm happy you liked this one :)!
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconshaneprocrastinates:
ShaneProcrastinates Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student General Artist
Thank you for sharing it! It was great =)
Reply
:iconleftunfinished:
LeftUnfinished Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
This is awesome!
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Thank you for taking the time to read my poem, LeftUnfinished, and for your kind compliment.
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconpaleauthor:
PaleAuthor Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student Writer
Ooh congrats for the DD La la la la La la la la La la la la La la la la La la la la La la la la La la la la La la la la 
Your poem is really awesome ^^
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014
Hello PaleAuthor, thank you very much!
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconpaleauthor:
PaleAuthor Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student Writer
You're welcome Sorry ^^
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014   Writer
Exquisite use of rhyme and contrasting imagery. 
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014
Thank you very much for reading and kindly commenting on my poem, earthling. I'm happy that you found the rhymes and images enjoyable.
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2014   Writer
The rhymes and images are what make this piece poetic. But what always draws me to your work is the lasting sense of its naked veracity. 
Reply
:iconsssorry:
Sssorry Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014
Thank you again! Your comment inspired my latest offering :). Sorry, amusing a muse thing :)!
White light,
Sorry
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014   Writer
Ah, sweet!
Reply
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